1. Dancing in public
By in public I do not mean in a night club or at a party or festival. I mean in the street, during the day, in the corner shop, in the supermarket, at the garden centre and in the swimming pool. Having worn Elsie in a sling for much of her first year of life I have gotten so used to swaying, bopping, bouncing and squating my way around life that I’ve forgotten how not to dance. The first time I went to the corner shop post Elsie, without Elsie she was about 10m old and I found myself dancing in the queue, at 2pm in the afternoon. When I realised my faux pas I felt the need to explain myself to the man behind me. He just laughed and said not to worry and that I have “rhythm”. Since this incident I have realised life is actually a happier place to be if you dance along. I don’t care if it looks totally bizarre.
2. Intellectual conversations
I used to love to explore intricate, abstract and philosophical concepts. Over a bottle of wine, country walk or lengthy telephone conversation.
Please don’t ask me anything complicated! Don’t ask me to think!! I don’t have space in my head to think about anything extra and you are distracting my limited processing power from thinking about what I want to think about which is: working out what I can cook for Friday night that is baby friendly, healthy, tasty, vegetarian, wheat free, not massively processed and can be prepared with one hand during the time Elsie eats her lunch on Thursday and provide a lunch for the next 5 days. Actually. Sod that. I don’t want to think at all, Please can you think about that for me too.
3. How I look
Here I am talking beyond basic cleanliness and health. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve never aspired to be magazine cover material and always focused my energy in other directions. But now? It’s fallen totally off the radar. I used to worry people would judge me for not making “an effort” but I’ve realised there is no law about having to make yourself look pretty.
4. Making up crap songs
I’ve always wanted to be good at music, but never really developed the skills. During my pregnancy I read that I should sing to my bump. I thought it was a good idea but the perfectionist in me got stuck in working out what song it should be, should I write one? What if it’s Rubbish? I never did sing to my bump.
Now? We have a song for everything. The songs are not remotely poetic or musically sound but they aid communication, provide cues, jolly us up and punctuate our days. They get us through! Here are a few examples:
I’m going to wash, wash, wash your wees away. Wash, wash, wash your wees away. Wash, wash, wash your wees away and wiggle your waggles away (to the tune of shake your sillies out)
We’ll have a cup of tea and a boobie, we’ll have a cup of tea and a boobie, we’ll have a cup of tea and a boobie, ’cause that’s what mummies and Elsies do, boom, boom boom (to the tune of Alice the camel)
Bye bye water, bye bye bubbles, bye bye day time, bye bye troubles (I don’t know where that time comes from)
5. Having low-brow tastes
Please consider this my official “coming out” I’ve always secretly liked a bit of crap telly, but now, if I get the chance to spend a few minutes in front of the box I need a zero-effort-super-fast-brainless- hit. I need something to turn my brain off to. I love made in Chelsea, TOWIE and 90210. While I’m confessing I might as well tell you I also love KFC, Krispy Kreme and all inclusive beach holidays. I wish I didn’t, but I do. Life’s too short to pretend otherwise.
What do you no longer care about? Either as the result of having a baby or due to other sources of personal change?