Moments of compassion

22 Apr

Work was hideous today. I felt like I was banging my head up against a brick wall, trying to get heard about ‘risk issues’ I am professionally responsible for communicating but powerless to act on. Lots of phone calls, dead ends and defensiveness. My heart raced and I exploded in a mess of tears in the office stairwell.

On returning home I wanted to skip karate, order a 14″ pizza, drink 2 cans of cider and pass out on the couch.

I found my self ruminating over all the crap that I had encountered during the day.

I stopped and noticed what I was doing.

As an experiment I tried, instead to notice all the compassion I had encountered through out the day:

The positive, inspirational blogs I read on the loo this morning.

Bronwyn returning her ball to me during our walk.

My colleague listening to me and supporting me.

The team secretary who decided not to bother putting through non-urgent calls.

The colleague who filled up my coffee cup without asking.

The colleague who contained me in the stair well.

The lady from social services who took me seriously.

My husband who took a panicked phone call from me at work. And listened.

My puppies who delighted in my return from work and licked my weary face.

All the people who liked and followed my blog πŸ˜‰

Me, who despite tendencies towards the unhelpful took herself off to karate.

My karate sensei, who caused me so much pain I forgot about all the mental stresses of the day.

It worked, I feel better, I feel supported and emotionally regulated.

Thank you πŸ™‚


12 Responses to “Moments of compassion”

  1. Dad April 22, 2013 at 8:05 pm #

    Alice we all love you and feel your pain. Embrace the love you get and ignore the shit.
    Remember Nil desperandum carburundum illegitemai. xxxx.
    Well done Dan, you are a star

  2. baconbiscuit212 April 23, 2013 at 9:35 pm #

    Big hugs to you! We have all had those days. Bravo for focusing on what lifts you up instead of all the things that pull you down.

    • longnoseddog April 24, 2013 at 5:13 am #

      Thank you for reading and your kind comment πŸ™‚ I was surprised by how much thinking about the good moments helped. It’s the sort of thing I advise other people to do without doing myself! X

  3. Jonathan Caswell April 27, 2013 at 3:34 am #

    And I thought I was the only one going through those kind of days! πŸ™‚ Glad you stopped to smell the flowers, so to speak. For a minute there, I thought you were going to wish you were wearing a hearing aide, so you could turn it off! First time I heard that my Dad actually used to do that some days…he was the Protestant Chaplain at a Psychiatric Center for years…I felt so crushed!

    • longnoseddog April 27, 2013 at 7:12 am #

      Thank you for reading and commenting! I can totally relate to the desire to ‘turn off the noise’ but I strongly believe that continuing to engage with that noise, although difficult, makes me grow as a person. Its also taken me a while to realise that we all feel like this at times! πŸ™‚

  4. Jonathan Caswell April 27, 2013 at 3:35 am #

    Reblogged this on By the Mighty Mumford and commented:

    • longnoseddog April 27, 2013 at 7:14 am #

      Ooh! Thank you, I always feel very honoured when some reads and comments on something I’ve written but have never been ‘reblogged’ before! Yay!

  5. reocochran April 27, 2013 at 5:06 pm #

    You are definitely inspiring others when on a sorta bad day you show that you can list the positives and see the sunny side of life! You go, girl, with that karate!! Thanks for checking me out and now you have another follower!

    • longnoseddog April 28, 2013 at 5:32 pm #

      Thank you for reading and following! It makes me happy when people take the trouble to read and engage with something I’ve written. I’m enjoying reading about your dating adventures! πŸ™‚

  6. Kitt Crescendo April 28, 2013 at 12:33 pm #

    Glad you were able to adjust your thinking & create a better day for yourself!

    • longnoseddog April 28, 2013 at 5:17 pm #

      Thank you, it was easier and more effective than I imagined it would be! Thank you for reading! πŸ™‚

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